What does forgiveness mean to you?
In order to forgive, do you need an apology?
Do you need to tell your story, be heard, before you can forgive others?

For years I have held on to events from the past that I never had a chance to talk about with the person who ‘did’ things to me.
For years, I have had a desire to ”pour my heart out” and confront those who have hurt me with the past.
I held onto the desire to close these chapters in this manner.
Until Papa God clearly laid on my heart that I do not need “closure”. And by that I am not saying that I did not need to close these chapters, I certainly did, but not according to the world’s guideline.
The world likes to tell us that we need ‘closure’ to move on with our lives. And the only way to get this closure is to confront that person with what has happened and actually force an apology in the end. Only in this way is it possible to REALLY move on with our lives.

Brown sand love text on seashore

Fortunately, Papa God opened my eyes in time to this trap that I and many with me fell for.
Closure literally means what it says, closure of a chapter. It is knowingly choosing to no longer build on a (negative) event in your life. You choose to no longer project your time, energy and attention onto that event.
This does not mean that you first need to have a conversation with the ‘perpetrator’ to confront him or her with what happened. You do not have to tell your story and the impact this event has had on your life.
Have you ever considered that this so-called perpetrator was unaware of the consequences of his actions? Have you ever considered that this perpetrator did not act with any malicious intent? Have you ever considered that this perpetrator was merely repeating patterns of what has been repeated in his family from generation after generation? And then a much more important question: What if the perpetrator does not regret his actions? The perpetrator feels no remorse whatsoever. Where does that leave you? Does that leave you clinging to the past for the rest of your life, letting this past dictate your present and your future? This only because you received no apology!

NO, that is not what you want and that is not what Papa God wants for us.
True “closure” is laying down what has happened in Papa’s hands. You literally lay it down on His altar and He will give you final closure! Closure without conditions. In this way you will experience true forgiveness!

Papa God shows us so much grace through His Son Jesus.
Let us extend this grace to others as well. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

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